Semper Fi

This is the story of a wounded Marine meeting the Commandant, as told by Former President Ronald Reagan in a speech, in 1987
My dad use to tell me about this, and now I just stumbled across it. It made me cry.

Excerpt from President Ronald Reagan’s March 4, 1987 speech, dealing with the Marine Barracks Bombing in Beirut, Lebanon:

“…May I share something with you I think you’d like to know? It’s something that happened to the Commandant of our Marine Corps, General Paul Kelley, while he was visiting our critically injured Marines in an Air Force Hospital. It says more than any of us could ever hope to say about the gallantry and heroism of these young men who serve so willingly so that others might have a chance at peace and freedom in their own lives and in the life of their country. I’ll let General Kelley’s words describe the incident.

He spoke of a ‘young marine with more tubes going in and out of his body than I have ever seen in one body. He couldn’t see very well. He reached up and grabbed my four stars, just to make sure I was who I said I was. He held my hand with a firm grip. He was making signals , and we realized he wanted to tell me something. We put a pad of paper in his hand - and he wrote “Semper Fi.”

Well, if you’ve been a Marine or if, like myself, you’re an admirer of the Marines, you know those words are a battlecry, a greeting, and a legend in the Marine Corps. They’re Marine shorthand for the motto of the Corps - “Semper Fidelis” — “Always Faithful.”

General Kelley has a reputation for being a very sophisticated general and a very tough Marine. But he cried when he saw those words, and who can blame him?”

October 23rd.....Already???

I honestly cannot believe October will be over next weekend. That's so scary. I remember just like it was yesterday that I posted on facebook that it was already October and how much I hated it. Andrew leaves in wayyyy less than 2 months, and I'm scared as anything, to be honest.I know worry is a lack of trust in God, but humans have a hard time with that. I've already been thinking of things to send him. I know what I'm going to be putting in his birthday package and our anniversary package. I also came up with an idea of how to countup this deployment. I'll post a picture when the dreaded time comes to make this thing. I've also tried to stay busy so I don't think about what is about to happen. When school isn't taking all my time, I try to atleast do some fun things!

Monday I went to Dollywood. It's a theme park in Tennessee that Ms. Dolly Parton owns. It was pretty fun! The last time I went was with Andrew right before bootcamp, so it had been awhile.

This was my favorite ride.



Also, on Thursday I carved pumpkins with Brinley and Lindsey. I had found a picture of a pumpkin I wanted to try to do.
This was the one I found.



And this was my finished product!!


I am in love with how it turned out! I think its WAY cute!!

I also went to see "The Social Network" last night, and it is a really good movie! A lot better then I thought it was!

Today, I got my two Bands for Arms braclets! They are awesome! If you don't know what I'm talking about, check this out: http://www.bandsforarms.com/


On a different note, Andrew has been in California for 2 weeks now, and I haven't heard his voice in a week now. He texts me here and there when he gets service, or he isn't busy....but man I miss that boy. It sucks that I can't talk to him now and then in a few weeks, I still won't be able to talk to him. Oh how I love the MC....

Now, I'm gonna try to convince my mom to take me shopping! We will see how that goes :) I know this blog was all over the place, but that is how my mind is these days.

Still learning

Even though I'm 21, I'm still learning things about myself all the time. Last night, my mom and I got into a disagreement. When I get upset or angry, I just shut down. I don't talk, I don't do anything really. I guess that is my way of making sure the other person knows that I'm mad. I know I do it with Andrew every time I get mad at him. But, even if he has hurt my feelings, I still don't want to hurt his, and it never once occured to me that by shutting down and not speaking to him might actually be hurting his feelings.

Last night, after my mom and I disagreed, I didn't say another word to her and I just went to bed. I was obviously just thinking about myself and never once how I was making her feel. This morning I woke up and was still kinda hurt from last night and didn't really say much. After lunch, I found a letter my mom wrote and she explained to me that how I was acting was hurting her feelings and that she would never act like this towards me EVEN IF we did argue. That really opened my eyes not only with my relationship with my mom but with Andrew too. I know that not talking isn't going to solve anything any faster, its just immature. I hate when I hurt my mom's feelings...it really does hurt my heart. And then, she apologizes that she hurt mine. Ugh, so of course that made me cry. I guess you learn as you grow and even in random moments, you can learn something about yourself that you never would have imagined. So here is to trying to stop acting so stupid if my feelings are hurt. I gotta talk it out.

Happy 10/10/10

First off, Happy 10/10/10. Today in church, Pastor Sam said when the next time 10/10/10 comes around, we will be in Heaven. Isn't that pretty cool to think about? I thought so.

Anyways....Andrew has been in California for about 3 days now, and I've really come to notice something. Whenever Andrew is gone and we can't talk, days drag on and on and on. He's gonna be there for 6 weeks and of course Verizon doesn't get any service in the desert so these 6 weeks are gonna take forever! Whenever I can call him or text him, the days just pass on by. I guess when my friends' husbands are deployed and I think the days are going by so fast, well to me they are, but to them they aren't. Just these 3 days have already made me DREAD December and this stupid deployment. I know that this deployment is going to bring me even closer to God and strength my faith in Him, because I know I am going to have to put complete trust and faith in Him because I'm gonna be helpless to do anything.

It's kinda weird though because in some ways I cannot wait for Andrew to leave (I know that sounds awful), but I can't wait to get this countdown started; I can't wait to start writing letters and sending carepackages!! I just can't wait until next summer!

Well, I need to get to study. This next week is not going to be fun whatsoever! Happy Sunday!

Definition of Love

I posted this on facebook and little bit ago and I just re-read it tonight and it gave me chills once again. It is such the truth.....

Love is a funny thing. You expect it to be easy. You expect it to be a world of roses and laughs and perfect moments that you find only in movies.



You expect him to always say the right thing, and to always know exactly how you feel, or exactly how to react to it. You expect him to calm you down when you’re yelling or to chase you when you run away. You expect so much that you feel entirely, and utterly defeated when something doesn’t exactly match up with all your plans. But that’s the thing.



Love isn’t a plan. It doesn’t have a certain beginning and it certainly has no end or visible finish line to those deeply in it.



Love happens; it is so incredibly messy. People around you can’t comprehend why you do the things you do, or why you fight so hard for something that seems to cause you so much pain, because simply, they can’t see. They can’t see the invisible ring of insanity that surrounds you when you’re in love.



It’s inconvenient, painful, and devastating at times, but we can’t live without it. What you don’t learn is how hard love is. How much of ourselves we have to put into it. How it isn’t worth it until we are complete and utter idiots about it.



Love isn’t him calming you down when you yell. It’s him yelling, just as loud, just as hard, right back at you. Right in your face to wake you up and to keep you grounded. It isn’t him bringing you roses everyday or cute things that make your relationship appear more presentable.



It’s after a fight, that drains the life and bones right out of both of you, and yet him showing up at your door the next morning anyway. It’s not him saying all the right things or knowing exactly how to handle you. So no, it’s not him caressing your hair and telling you everything is going to be okay. It’s him standing there, admitting he’s just as scared as you are.



You have to remember that with love, you’re not the only one involved. You’re unknowingly put your life, your heart into the palms of anothers hands and said, here. Do what you will. Mash it into a million pieces. Mash it into mince meat. Or forget I ever handed it to you in the first place. Just as long as you have it.



It makes reality invisible and it erases all the lines that we shouldn’t cross. Because love isn’t about fencing ourselves in; feeling safe, feeling sure about the future. It’s about scaring the sh*t out of every nerve in our body, but pushing forward anyway.Because all the fighting and all the tears and all the uncertainty is worth it.



And it’s a heck of a lot better, than being 100% happy without someone to show us that there is a world of difference between feeling ‘happy’ and feeling whole.

I gotta keep this thing up to date....

A lot has been happening! First, Nursing School has been going pretty well! I've been in school for a little over a month and a half and it has flown by. I'm hoping the next 16 months fly by as well! It has been stressful and busy with studying ever weekend, but I know in the end when I'm able to graduate, it is going to be all worth it!

Also, I have gotten to see Andrew 2 times this month. Two weekends ago, Andrew got a random 96 and he came home. I absolutely LOVE when he comes home. Things are so much better when he is in Knoxville. I love hanging out with him around both of our families and just being able to do things. It makes my heart happy. We went to the UT vs Florida football game, which was the first one we got to go to together since 2008. Even though we lost and it was miserably hot outside, it was fun being with him.
Then, just this past weekend was the Marine Corps Birthday Ball. Andrew's was early this year because in November he will be training and not be here, so they pushed it up. I gotta admit, it was nearly as fun or as nice as the one in 2008. This year's was on base in a field house with no A/C. Outside felt better then in did in there. We only stayed until the presentation was over and we left to go to Ihop to eat! It felt like prom all over again, but it was fun. I left bright and early Sunday morning to get home to have time to study for my test on Monday. I hate leaving Jacksonville. I feel like that is where I am meant to be I feel like....oh well...


That's just a little bit of what has been going on in my life....fun right? haha

My heart is hurting

I don't even know where to start with this. Everytime I think about it, I want to start crying. One of the sweetest, most caring, and loving girls that I know doesn't deserve to be going through what she is. Thursday morning I woke up for work and got on facebook. I see Chrissy's status that said "This isn't happening, it can't be". Chrissy and I have become texting buddies, I guess you would say. Every since her boyfriend deployed, her and I text each other a lot. Venting has always helped my soul and no matter what she was going through, she always listened to me and gave wonderful advice and support. When I texted her Thursday, I asked her what was wrong and she told me that Josh had died. At first I thought it was a joke, and then I didn't know what to do. I was so confused and heart broken for her. All I could do was cry. I cried for her pain and her loss. I know she is unbearably sad and confused. I know I would be. I honestly don't know how I would manage to keep breathing. But as I have seen over the last couple of days, Chrissy is so much stronger then I could ever think of being. I know she is going through more then she ever has before and she is having a hard time with people, but she still goes on. She is still living as hard as it is. I admire her strength and her courage. I've been thinking about her constantly since I found out. I've been praying and I know God will take care of Chrissy, but it still doesn't make things any easier. I honestly do not not how I could handle something like this, and it makes me so scared for Andrew to be going over to Afghanistan soon. I don't know what I'm trying to say. Chrissy is living my worst nightmare and I just wish this was all a dream. She didn't deserve this and it just saddens me because I can only imagine how much pain she is in. I hope God comforts her as quickly as possible!! I don't know if she will ever read this, but I'm so sorry Chrissy. You're an angel and I'm always here for you if you need someone to listen to you! Hang in there and know that so many people love you.... :(

RIP Josh

Also, the board I am on has rasied over $1000 to help Chrissy. Who knew women that you meet online can become such a sisterhood and love eachother so much! It is just amazing to me and I'm proud to be a part of it!